One of the most mind boggling concepts for me to truly understand is time. What exactly is time? Why do we have time? How many meanings and definitions does the word time have? Why does time go fast and go slow? the questions will continue to continue. I have always been concerned with time. Never feeling I have enough time, how fast time tends to fly by and trying to fit everything within a certain time period.
This time last year, I was in a completely different position. I was a freshly released high school graduate anxiously and nervously awaiting the journey of college. Now a year later, I sit in my bed at home after surviving one year of college, wondering if I will be able to make it through the summer.
The freshman year experience is certainly one that I will never ever forget. This entire year was a time in my life which I discovered a multitude of things about myself, the world, friends, community, faith and life. It is crazy to think that in just ten months a wondrous of events and changes can occur. I entered college, much like many freshman do, as a very naive eighteen year old. Yes, I had my wits about the world, but I did not have my wits about everything and everyone I would be exposed to and the affect they would have on me. It would probably take me a very very long time to explain everything I went through throughout the course of my freshman year, but for the sake of your time, I will keep it short and sweet.
August 2014: Change
Saying goodbye to everything I knew and was comfortable with was the biggest and toughest change. I went from being an only child to sharing a bathroom with three other girls. The value of privacy was nonexistent. School was hard, a lot harder than I imagined. Everything was new, literally everything. From my daily routine, friends, weather, environment, academics and much more. It was hard to wrap my head around that for the next year this was my life and this was college.
September 2014: Comfort
Finding comfort was something that came and went in random periods. There would be days where I felt right at home and then there would be days that I felt so out of place. Comfort would sometimes be crying on the phone to my mother or meeting a new person in my class who shares similar interest as I did.
October 2014: Reality
The three month milestone had hit, things began falling into place and everything was starting to become a real reality. I found community, a group of people who I felt comfortable around, who made me laugh, were trustworthy and shared similar morals and beliefs as I did. I was done coping with "homesickness" (at least for that period of time) and was learning to love my school and this new city.
November 2014: Loss
The idea of time coming to an end played a role during this month in my life. I experienced familial loss for the first time and the effect it had on me. I lost my Grandpa during this month. He was 99 years strong and God was ready to welcome him into his Kingdom. Things began hitting home for me. I still am not sure what happened but something changed.
December 2014: Home
A month long relief was needed. After a whirlwind of change and newness, a break was beautiful thing. The one thing about holiday break was coming back home. The rhythm of college was in full effect and now I had to switch the roles and say goodbye to people who had become my family. Home was different, seeing people from high school and how everyone has changed for the better or not at all.
January 2015: Faith
I attended the Passion Conference in Atlanta over MLK weekend and this was the most heart and faith shaking experiences of my life. I was raised a Christian, I attended private Christian schools my entire life, yet my relationship with God was not full or even existent at times. Throughout my freshman year, I became reliant on one person and that was God. I joined a weekly small group that has truly helped build my relationship with Christ to a whole new level. After attending Passion my heart, mind and soul was anew and I call myself a follower, lover and believer of Christ.
February 2015: Age
Turning nineteen was unexpected and uneasy. I guess I am still in shocked that I have lived almost two decades now (wow). My childhood and kid like spirit is slowly slipping away and to be honest it is a hard thing to digest (I'm not ready to grow up). This was my first birthday out of my comfort zone, I wasn't at home with my family and friends, I woke up on my birthday in a complete state of newness. Although nineteen has been challenging, I look forward to the year ahead for change, discovery and life.
March 2015: Adulthood
I went on my first Spring Break without a parental guardian of any kind. I became a Young Lives Leader. I navigated Nashville on my own. I did a lot of things for myself, whether that be overcoming my anxiety or staying in the library till 3 am, I did it. Its crazy what college can do to you. Throughout this month, I felt very mature, emotionally and mentally. With this mindset in hand it helped me conquer a lot of things, good and bad.
April 2015: Growth
My last month as freshman, the picture within the puzzle began to look complete. I exposed myself to a variety of different clubs and activities at my school just for the heck of it. One of the best feelings in the world is going after something you are so nervously afraid to do and being able to accomplish it, that is what college is all about. This lesson proved itself right in front of my eyes in a multitude of ways.
May 2015: Sophomore
Well I did it, I made it through my first year of college. I am still trying to wrap my head around all the many changes, realizations and discoveries I made about myself and the world this year. I definitely took a leap out of my comfort zone this year and walked with God who showed me this world in a different mindset. In just ten months time, I have changed. I am different person than who I was a year ago. Time is beautiful thing, looking back on this year, I have learned to cherish time, do not rush it, do not dread it, just live in it (no matter how bad it is). So heres to freshman year, a year for the books!
And with all this said... Happy Summer!
Thanks for reading today's post on Ever Wonder! Be sure to come back soon for more post on fashion, lifestyle and more.
-Katelynn Elizabeth-
Labels: belmont university, change, College, freshman, friends, homesick, nashville, new, nineteen, pinterest, reflection, semester reflection, summer break, time
